Sunrise

DREAM AGAIN

2011-09-04T15:04:00.000+01:00

Dream,

Think about who you can be
Not about what you have failed to be
Dream about what you can achieve
Not what didn’t work out

Dream,
Dream about the change you can bring
And not about the chances that couldn’t be
Dream about what you can have
Not what you couldn’t get

Dream,
Dream about where you are going
Not where you couldn’t get to
And when every thing has crumbled
Its time to dream again

Beautiful People 2

2010-06-19T18:12:00.002+01:00

Before I continue with this list, let me apologise to the male-folk. This particular post is to women who are inspiring other people - it is not meant to be feminist or 'girl power-ish', I only thought of these women and decided to talk about them. Thanks for understanding (*wink*).

3. CeCe Winans (Singer, Author, Presenter): I think about her and I am amazed at how a well-developed skill can cut across borders and boundaries. The effect of the combination of her voice and her spirit is so powerful, that you have to listen to her song, even if you don’t want to. Her gift has taken her from the podiums of Grammy Awards, to the almighty White House, and boy, she is stylish! She’s got a smashing figure for a mother of twenty-something-years, but always manages to be modest. Her smile and her face are both pretty (sometimes I just can’t help staring at her photograph). She is deep, she is beautiful.

4. Joyce Meyer (Preacher, Author, and Host of Enjoying Everyday Life): To use the words of other people, her institution is the largest faith-based organization to be run by a woman, so far, in the world. She constantly speaks of how to overcome difficult challenges in life, as she overcame her own experiences of sexual and substance abuse. She encourages that we should have a good relationship with other people, and most especially, with ourselves (Check out her book – Eat the Cookie, Buy the Shoes). She did not allow her personal weaknesses and the negativities of her past to overcome her. Instead, she turned them into major strengths that have become pointers for other people. Isn’t she beautiful?

5. Abike Dabiri-Erewa, Hon. (Journalist, Politician): I am speechless when I think of her. Even as I write this, I am short of words. She is emotional, and peaceful, yet she manages to be firm, hardworking and courageous. She’s not only made a name for herself both in Nigeria and outside the borders of Africa, she has earned the respect of men and women alike. I once attended a conference during which she shortly mentioned her movement from NTA to politics. I remember her words “They were confident I could do it …[so] I attended ward meetings and got involved with the people…” From the 8 year old investigation of Mary, the miracle baby (do you remember?), to the sponsorship of Nigerian Infant Health Welfare Bill (the bill that ensured that every child 5 years and below gets free healthcare services), our honorable senator has proven that depth, strength, valor and compassion are the beauty of a woman that years cannot wrinkle .

If there are women who inspire you, why not make your own list and share with me.

Beautiful People 1

2010-06-01T13:28:00.002+01:00

I was once asked to mention something or someone I think is beautiful and give reasons why. I realized that pin-pointing one person as beautiful is quite a difficult task; particularly in our world where you won’t feature in a celeb magazine, if you don't have a slamming body (either by work-out or plastic surgery) and wrap luxury brands like Gucci or Prada round it . You may make it into the popular event-publicizing publications if you wear enough make-up, eye-popping jewelry or at least an odd-looking piece of fashion item that you call unique. I smile when I think of how that word unique has lost its true meaning (which is - special, distinct or one of its kind). If we honestly examine the people around us, we will see that every individual is special and different from others; it’s just that we have allowed our experiences, our thoughts and the opinions of others to determine how much value we place on ourselves. I thought of women who have changed the lives of countless others and I came up with the names of five my favorite women and why I think they should be in the league called ‘Beautiful’. Please note that this list has no specific order. Enjoy!

1. Kari Jobe (Singer):
If you’ve ever enjoyed the music experience of Darlene Zchech, then you’ll love Kari Jobe, except that she adds a bit of rock to some of her songs. I love this statement in her website bio - "Young girls dream about becoming lawyers, fashion designers, nurses or mothers. Kari Jobe knew at 10 that she would be a [singer...]” By the time she left grad school, she was doing just that. Ask a fresh graduate about his/her plans for the future; you’ll not get a reply that talks about affecting lives with one’s gifts and abilities. Even the regular upcoming professional thinks of the future in terms of financial or statutory rewards. Anytime I remember Kari, I usually ask myself one of these two questions: ‘I am following my heart in the decisions I make?’ ‘Am I doing what I know I should do with my life?’

2. Dotun Arifalo (Pastor, Author, and Founder - God’s Leading Ladies Worldwide): I heard about her as a fresher back then at the Obafemi Awolowo University. Even as an undergraduate, she was an icon feminine strength and role model to people of her faith. Smart, pretty, disciplined, spiritual, she has such an overwhelming zeal to help people. Her passion is contagious and she is inspiring, as no one I gave her book or CD said less than “Wow!” I think a beautiful woman should have some of these qualities at least.

I’m Strong, You Are Weak (and there's nothing you can do 'bout it!)

2010-04-28T13:14:00.002+01:00

Whether sexual, verbal, emotional or physical, there has never been a logical reason or a progressive motive for abuse. The world has taken a different form from what it used to be centuries ago. Although there were reported cases of maltreatment and detrimental use of power, there has not been a time in history where people were as vulnerable to their fellow human beings, as they are today. Worst still, abusers are getting more creative. Yes, creative. How else can you explain the insatiable thirst for something you cannot have either due to lack of resources or by the simple dictates of nature? Somewhere not so far from where you are right now, someone is at the receiving end of the misuse of power entrusted in those who are meant to protect, guide or help them. A man just decided that the best way to prove his manhood is to beat his wife into submission; a parent is neglecting the needs and desires of the children and enforcing his/her own and the child is going to have to pay for that decision in a few years; a boss is getting bonuses for a project he didn’t do any work for (mental or physical); a student is getting an ‘F’ for refusing a lecturers advances.

“All power tends to corrupt, [but] absolute power corrupts absolutely.” There, the famous words of Acton, the British historian. Power speaks of control and influence, but we sometimes forget that it also means a higher capacity and strength – being better than someone in something. I remember a scene in the series, Heroes. At her brother’s funeral, Chloe stood up to her grandmother and said “I’m supposed to look up to my elders, but I can’t believe a word you say!” All around the world, a person is expected to esteem or revere those who are ahead of him either in age, position or accomplishments; I maintain that this is non-negotiable. However, if we take a holistic look at the society, social stratifications seem to point out that positions of authority exist for the purpose of order, direction and justice, targeted at the long term good of the group or organization, and those who are being led. For example, a child who constantly refuses to listen to the advice of his/her parent is probably writing a suicide letter. Why? The mother or father knows more than the child does, either from personal experiences or by just observing of those of others.

On the other hand, there have been cases of young children making costly mistakes by just doing what they are told. This is not to give adults or leaders a bad name (as I am one myself), the question leaders should be asking themselves is why they are giving the kind of advice they give. Although a person’s paradigm is sharpened by experience, and proves that there is no such thing as a perfect person, do we assist those we are meant to help to make informed choices or we just do what we think? This same question of power comes to play in sexual abuse, which is the most common and accepted form of abuse. Although feminists fight for equality and precise gender balance, we all know that the social reality is quite different, as the only means of precise and accurate measurement in life exist in ‘orthodox or sensu-stricto science’ (Thanks to Peter Macinnis, Australian science writer, for this definition). As I always say, human beings are not mathematics. If they are, how come you plan a party for hundred people and you don’t have exactly hundred guests? You will have more or a little less. How about if you stand in front of a queue and say something to the first person; only to hear from the last person and find something different from what you said (or even the exact opposite!) Women are being sexually abused by the men who mother-nature placed in the society to protect them. The physical strength, the deep sense of logic and the ego that men posses weren’t put in them so they can take advantage of, or intimidate the women around them. According to rainn.org, approximately 73% of rape victims know their assaulters; about 10% of them are cases of incest!

It’s not just men that should get the flaks for sexual abuse, women should get some too. Although I’m one of those who advocate that no woman deserves or ‘asks’ for rape, I believe that a woman should never use her intuition, relational strength or her keen capacity to be sensitive to “pull a man down”. Believe it or not, 1 out of 33 men have been sexually assaulted! I know this may sound unbelievable, but I personally know a guy that was raped! Even if we refuse to admit it, it remains true that the chances of maltreatment, hurt and abuse is on the increase. Nonetheless, we can stop this expanding cycle by doing one simple thing – questioning our motives. You may not be in a position of authority, but you have people within your circle of influence. The worst of crimes can be committed with the purest of motives. We all have powers of some sort, how are we using it?

Life

2010-03-24T16:59:00.005+01:00

Life is a race
a race with a pace.
Life is a phase,
a face;
a place, someplace, no place?
Life is a day -
day without a night.
You just keep living,
Until the lender comes
To demand a return
For the loan
The loan you owe
And own?

Life is a bay,
a bay of raging storms.
Life is a longing,
longing for peace,
for pleasure and for happiness,
The wounded long for well-ness
And the broken for wholeness.
The battered, the jarred and the torn -
all worn,
The loner, the hungry and the wicked cluster
Together
On that one small beach
For something beyond their reach

Life is a risk,
a risk with hopes,
Held with thin ropes.
Life is a sea,
for all you can see
Is the turbulence
The opulence,
Hidden for those who can whisk
and risk.

There comes the day again
that you have to count your gain.
The gain, the aim, the pay
Will be that one last sigh
and satiety
That all has been done
That should be
With all that came your way

Should, should, should

2010-03-24T16:58:00.000+01:00

Should I have come this far with the pain
Should I have let it just go away
Than be blown away
This way, that way
And again this way
Without knowing what the road is
Or who it is I am walking with

Should I have blown the pain away
Should I have wondered what it would be
With you, without you
And with you again
All the same wonder
If there would be an end
Or simply eternity

Should I have let it take me
Should I have just let go
And fly
Fly alone, fly abroad
And again fly alone
To that seeming unbeatable realm
Without pain or gain

There, see, my speculation
My search, my stride and my march
Should I wait…?
There also lies my pain,
My fears and my tears
I’ve hurt for so long
Now my aching heart should rest

But I've found my victory
My strength and my pride
In this storm

Phenomenal,
That’s what they call me now
And I’m moving on
No looking back!

HOW IN THE WORLD...!

2010-03-24T16:17:00.002+01:00

I thought I knew where I was headed
Until the road parted into two
I thought I knew how to, and how not to
Until I got to this stop-
No sign-boards, no pointing arrows
Just plain dry sand.

The fog is heavy, the sky is gloomy
No sun, just tiny particles of dust
Covering almost every object
Muddled, hazy
It seems I’m in a maze
How in the world did I get here?

My map lies beside me
But it isn’t clear
Is it the way I turned it, or the way I read it
I don’t even know
The rain is threatening,
I don't know what next,
I just want to leave this place!

A JOURNEY THAT CHANGED LIVES

2010-03-24T16:16:00.001+01:00

I had been anticipating this trip in excess of two years. From the first day I heard that mandatory trips to neighbouring francophone countries were included in our year abroad equivalent programme, I had been wondering what the experience would be like. At the registration stand, one of the new students asked, “Is it true that we are going to travel?” She looked up, zesty, hands gesticulating, her gusto a sharp disparity to the ennui of the attendant. It was conspicuous she was expecting an affirmative response. “Yes”, he replied, “at least once in a semester”. The whole line of registrants stirred. C'est vrai, nous allons voyager au Togo et au République de Bénin.

Since the four air-conditioned ‘coaster’ buses couldn’t accommodate all the students, I had to wait for my turn. What an excruciating wait it was! At long last, I’m really going to natter with Francophiles outside the classroom. Cool! As the bus cruised through the road, Monsieur Bello, our guide, told us to take note of things that can improve the quality of life in Nigeria if we practice them. Every time I went out of my home, I couldn’t help but observe the dirty, monochrome sand on both sides of our roads. Hand-rails with peeling top coats, one-foot elevated concrete slabs that divide the ‘express’, and buildings lining the roads, all have acquired the grime. Everything on the road takes on a matching ash-like colour. But Bénin roads held a different narrative.

As we approached the border, gasps filled the vehicle. As if it was rehearsed, all of us students let out a sigh. One after the other, from the front row to the back, the shiny eyes, parted lips and slightly raised brows replicates on the face of every one passenger. As the red and white striped lever raised itself as if someone was operating it with a remote control, one by one, vehicles filed through the gates. When I finally got over the shock, I said “Obviously, this is not Nigeria”. The words were barely a whisper. The orderly manner in which the vehicles crossed the border astonished everyone. Private cars occupied the middle-left lane, commercial ones on the right, while the lanes on both extremes were meant for long vehicles and cargo buses. Each driver placed money in the boxes meant for tolls.

The clean streets, well planned transport and obedience to traffic rules implied a deliberate systemic and organised way of living - traits our country seemed to lack back then. That was over two years ago, but every time I come across someone that went on that trip; I noticed the way he/she waits at a traffic light or only cross the road at a zebra crossing. Today, I refused to throw a tiny piece of paper on the floor, but waited till I found a public trash basket! One thing was clear, the responsible social culture had imprinted itself on our hearts.

Dear Worried Girl,

2010-03-24T16:14:00.000+01:00

I can imagine your hurt right now. It’s hard to really be happy when you feel you are not getting the good things of life that you really deserve. I agree with you that your friends are over-emphasizing their achievements and giving you the flaks; like Madea says, life happens.

This is the first thing you should know, you shouldn’t allow people to determine the way you feel about yourself. Absolutely no! Your friends may be riding the best cars or having vacations on the moon but you don’t know what they are going through when no one is there. You don’t know if their husbands are cheating on them (with their knowledge!), you don’t know if they’ve had to see psychologist or you don’t know if they have to take medications everyday to keep sane. All you see is what they have that you don’t have, and it will keep eating you up until you decide to accept who you are and where you are today. That’s the only way you can determine a better tomorrow.

You also have to prioritise, that is decide what truly matters in life. What are the things that really matter to you? What do you really want from your life? Have you spoken with a trusted counsellor, pastor or a (wise) older person about it? Set your own goals, (not based on our society’s image of success – let it be what you really want) and do some soul-searching. You might find out that the reason you don’t have what they seem to have (like a good marriage) may be because you are looking in the wrong places or you don’t love yourself enough to believe you can attract the suitable kind of man. As for a job, what kind of job do you want? Define it. And believe me; you can get job satisfaction with good pay. You might also need to talk to someone who has advanced in that career and you’ll find out that it’s easier than you think to get a better job.

As for your friends, it might be better for you to use your discretion on how often and how closely you relate. If they are such good friends they should be thinking of how you can get better, and not flashing their stuff in your face. Right now you need to believe in yourself, what you have to offer a man and what you have to offer the whole world at large. Bad feelings won’t do you any good, they will only make things worse. If you want to get better, start thinking about how you can move forward. Hang around people who won’t put you down. Nobody will strive to make you happy – it’s something you have to do one your own.

I also agree with the person that said you need to let God help you. He knows much more than you do in this matter and HE is willing to let you in on it.

Kind regards,
Iyinoluwa Balogun

HEALING COMES, for Ayodeji Sunkanmi Adebola

2010-02-17T14:44:00.005+01:00

Life’s challenges come in doses

Realities change as the heart awakens

Although it was roughened, toughened and broken

The heart,

Yes, the heart will definitely heal

Although the heart has been broken

Healing comes as each day goes by

A new life springs

After the old battered one has mourned

Like a rose-bud

No one knows the beauty about to be seen,

Until the flower blooms.

The bud opens to such breath-taking beauty,

A joy to behold

The broken heart as well

After an experience of hurt and broken promises

It springs back to life with untold beauty

Intricacies to love and to be loved for

Wisdom to teach and reach for

With each second, each hour,

Each day and year,

The heart,

Yes the heart definitely heals.

WAKE UP!!!

2009-10-30T11:17:00.001+01:00

We all know that times have changed. Obviously times have changed... or how else can we explain the global downturn, the longer working hours, the increase of new discoveries, the increse in new products - by the way do you know that there is now a vaccine for HIV? The rate at which the world is changing is rapidly increase is really alarming and some events give cause for greater alarm.

A colleague once told me that his 11 year old brother said his classmates came to school with a pornographic video on his phone, and all his friends watched it. just last week, someone posted a video on facebook. I had to close the clip after watching just 10 seconds of it - you can imagine how disgusting it was. Those 10 seconds took about hours to erase from my memory. my question is this, what are young people doing with there lives and time. The seemingly harmless act of watching x-rated videos are actually not harmless. I'll explain in subsequent posts.

There is fire on the mlountaintop, and as Asa says, no one is running. If you want to escape the fire of this changing world, you've got to run. They say that success in life is not a coincidence. That means if you have a desired future, an idea or image of where you want to be that means you have to carefully plan what you see, hear, think, say and do. What plans are you making right now?

Library 101

2009-09-29T17:12:00.001+01:00

Do you think it’s cheaper to borrow books or CDs than to buy them? You don’t think you are a collector so why should you have a personal library?
You can borrow a book or CD from the church library or even from a friend of yours. You could make a few notes and then return it to the owner but if you need to look up a point that was made in the book what would you do? Of course your friend would not mind your borrowing it one more time. What if you decided to try out something the author said and you found out that it works? That means that for every other information you would have to borrow it again and again. It also means that you would have to rush to finish with the book or CD so that you can return it on time.
It is popularly said that you are what you eat. We might not physically eat books or CDs but the knowledge we gain form them feed our minds and our spirit. If you are what you eat, then you should have a constant supply of the things you feed on. We all have storehouses. A storehouse for food, a ‘storehouse’ for clothes and a storehouse for money; but many of us don’t think it is necessary to have a storehouse for information and knowledge. Having a personal library ensures that you have constant access to what will keep feeding your faith. Since faith comes by hearing whatever builds your faith should be kept close by.
If you get your own copy of a book you will have more time to read and reread. As for CDs you can listen to them over and again while you pray or meditate. You will have more time to make use of them to suit your study habits as you are not under any pressure to return them. You can read the book or listen to the CDs at your own convenience. You can also make notes in the books and you can make clips of the CDs for other personal use.
We only place priority on what we value and if you value something you will invest your resources in it most especially money. In Luke 12:34 Jesus said “Where your treasure is there will your heart be also”. A person who values designer clothes will have a collection of designer clothes. A person who likes gadgets will spend his last dime on them. A person who attaches importance to God will spend money on books and CDs that will help his/her understanding and application of the Word of God. Everyone is a collector. Whether we acknowledge it or not we all have a collection of one item or the other. Show me your library and I will tell you who you are!
Having your personal library also means that you take your destiny seriously and that you are consciously and purposefully taking steps to get you to where you are supposed to be. In other words you are someone to watch out for! When you eventually get to the top it will be proof to other people that the principles in the word of God that you practice are reliable and sure.
Also every time you buy the product of any ministry you are actually sowing into that ministry. You might not be able to send several thousands of naira like their partners do but you can buy a CD or a book. Consequently the grace and the anointing that is peculiar to that ministry will begin to find expression in your life. Either directly as a donation or from the proceeds from your purchase of their materials your seed is a seed. Your buying those materials IS a seed.